April? Really?

Allow me a quick plug for Pause Central under the el at Berwyn and for Cafe Neo under the el at Lincoln Square. I've used and abused their wi-fi plenty in the absence of having my own in the house.

Today it was actually windy inside my apartment. Not so cozy. I tried to light candles to warm the place up a bit (heat is landlord-controlled), but the wind kept blowing them out. I stuffed pillows and coats into the window sills to no avail. (Yes, the windows are closed and locked. I checked.) I stood in a scalding shower for a half hour trying to get my blood up to 98.6 degrees. I put on 3 layers of clothing, 2 hats, snow boots, and a space heater. I stayed cold all day.

Too late in the afternoon, I discovered it was warmer outdoors than in.

What a pisser. I hate the Midwest, even Chicago. The weather is shitty. The minute I turn forty (if not sooner), my ass is outta here, rich, poor, or in-between.

For now I'll have to head back to that cold shithole of an apartment (I loved it dearly until this morning), wrap up in 20 blankets and hunker down until the weather improves. I still haven't bought "rabbit ears" for my TV, so I can't even veg properly. I've taken to lying on my sheepskin rug wrapped in an electric mattress pad trying to numb out to my 829th viewing of Harry Potter. Hot.

It doesn't help that I'm in the first week of a new diet in addition to the soon-to-be-second week of not smoking. The combo of not eating, smoking or drinking (too many calories--what a shame) always lowers my internal temperature by at least 10 degrees. I'm operating at 88.6 right now. Ouch. Cold is pain. I hate them both.